Star actress, Foluke
Daramola, turns heads wherever she steps into. In this interview by Tribune Newspaper,
she talks about her passion for youth mentorship, marriage and career. Excerpts...
Why have you taken up the
responsibility of advising young women against issues like rape and domestic
violence in recent times?
I
have decided to be a motivator to the youths, especially the female gender,
reason being that I believe that Nigeria is a country that is vast and rooted
and we are getting our priorities wrong.
How do you mean?
We
are the ones causing these problems we are facing by ourselves. If you trace
the causes of domestic violence, you will find out that it is that woman who does
not understand her own value, that
allows herself to be abused by a man. If you see it coming, check it. Nowadays,
women are so dependent on their husbands and apart from the fact that they are
not themselves, most of them all live a lie. And because we live a lie, we
cannot sustain that lie, so to sustain it, you depend on a man and that man
will take her for granted and take advantage of her, although not all men do
this.
Apart
from the fact that I have been abused and raped when I was younger, I have been
through a marriage and what is fundamental and what I preach to the younger
generation is that at the end of the day, one will go into marriage as a
partner and if the partnership isn’t strong, there will be retrogression, so
I’m most passionate about my country and about the youths.
It’s commonplace these days
to see celebrity marriages hitting the rocks, why do you think this is becoming
rampant?
First
and foremost, I don’t think it’s only celebrity marriages that do not last
these days, it’s very general, but I think we are fast losing the hold and be
able to tolerate each other. It’s not about celebrities, it’s just because we
are in the limelight, so the tendency of it getting out there when it happens
is very high.
Secondly,
the pressure of the economy can affect the male gender as well. Here in Nigeria, there are a lot of
sentimental attachments, so the pressure will be put on the partners, if it’s a
beautiful woman, there would be a lot of pressure on her, from the money bags
who will promise her so much. I am not
talking from the celebrity point of view here but the general sense. We have a
lot of people who have set the pace, for instance, Joke Silva, Omotola Jalade
and Toyin Adewale, but because we are in the limelight, it will certainly raise
a lot of buzz, and if one is not prayerful and possess a right mindset, one
will get swayed. Inasmuch as I like to be seen as a celebrity, I also like to
be seen as a rooted person and a realist, who is passing a vital message to the
younger generation.
This
is Nollywood and not Hollywood, do not start living a life that you cannot
sustain, if your husband earns N300,000 a month, don’t go and buy a weavon of
N150,000. If you do, you will then have
to add other things which end up bringing undue pressure on your home and
before you know it, the home will break,
so it’s important to place less emphasis on the physical and more
emphasis on what you cannot see.
I read your husband’s
message to you on Facebook a while ago and he really extolled your values and
praised you…with all that, what length are you willing to go to make this
marriage work?
I
have always said this, although people think I can’t do it. If I have a case of infidelity, I will deal
with it. It won’t break my home, it will come as a phase and it will pass. The
only thing which I know can break my home and I pray against, is domestic violence or abuse of any kind,
because that will kill me psychologically and bring out the worst in me, but my
mum has made me to understand that every man is a child, and once you
understand that, ko si bi ori se mari ti
kofi ni mi(nobody is infallible), once
you understand that, you are mothering that man and you will be able to sustain the home.
I
learnt from my first marriage that not all that glitters is gold and the grass
is always green on the other side, a woman is in a marriage as a wife and a
child. She is not there to compete with her man because of ego.
Behind the cameras, who is
Foluke Daramola?
I’m
blunt and straightforward, I’m a mother
who loves to cook. I enjoy quiet moments with my children and I’m not a
fanatic, but I’m a very prayerful person.
We’ve seen a lot of your
colleagues fizzle out, what has kept you going?
God
has kept me going and also it’s a matter of one daring to be different and
thinking outside the box, so far we haven’t spoken about my life as an actress
in this interview, that’s to show you that at each point in time, one has to be
able to think outside the box, because as an actor, when the ovation is
loudest, you have to take a bow and if you do not plan for your back stage, you
will fall and frustration will set in. Showbiz has never taken me away from the
reality of being myself, I still see my friends as my friends, if I still feel
like taking boli [roast plantain]I take boli, if I still feel like riding
bikes, I ride bikes. So stardom has not gotten into my head.
No comments:
Post a Comment