Wednesday, 8 October 2014

BREAKING THE SILENCE - What To Do If You Are Raped!



Ronke Ajayi (not real names), a 200-level Microbiology student of one of the universities in Lagos State, left class that afternoon without any clue of the terrible evil that was lurking in store for her – she had hardly walked four blocks away from the lecture room when some hands grabbed her from back and gagged her before pulling her roughly into one of the lecture-rooms in the adjoining block.
She was stripped in a flash and pinned on top of a long desk while her assailants took turn on her – she was being gangraped in broad-day light!
The rapists had their fill, jeered her and strangely, just sauntered away, possibly because, they felt she could do nothing about the rape, as in, she would be ‘ashamed’ to report it to anybody or the relevant authorities!



She wiped away her tears, pulling herself together before wearing her clothes - she was able to recognize one or two of their faces BUT she was ‘devastated’ and ‘undecided’ of what to do next!
Like Ronke, it is disheartening that many people (women, including men – I’ve heard about a ‘guy’ who was gangraped in one of our schools though that is another story for another day) have found themselves in this dilemma BECAUSE after a sexual assault, a victim has a lot of choices/decisions to make – e.g. getting medical care, making a police report and telling other people.
The victim may even have concerns about the impact of the assault and the reactions of friends and family members; so, what is/are the step/steps a victim should take after being sexually assaulted?
These tips would provide the answers and even calm the victim(s): 

·        The first thing is that you must come to terms with the fact that it has happened to you and it wasn’t your fault – you are not the first/last person such thing would/will happen to; point is, you still have your life to live.
·        Call or contact and confide in a friend, family member or someone who can be with you and give you support.
·        Get medical care as soon as possible. Go to a hospital emergency department – even if you think that you do not have any physical injuries, you should still have a medical examination and discuss with a health care provider the risk of exposure to sexually transmitted infections and the possibility of pregnancy resulting from the sexual assault.
·        If you suspect you have been given a ‘rape drug,’ ask the hospital or clinic where you receive medical care to take a urine sample. Drugs such as Rohypnol and GHB are more likely detected in urine than blood.
·        Preserve all physical evidence of the assault. Do not bathe, douche, eat, drink, wash your hands or brush your teeth until after you have had a medical examination. Save all the clothing you were wearing at the time of the assault. Do not clean or rearrange the area the assault occurred.
·        Write down as much as you can remember about the circumstances of the assault, including a description of the assailant.
·        Reporting the crime can help you regain a sense of personal power and control. If you want to report the crime, notify the police immediately. The sooner you make a report, the more likely it is that the police will be able to collect important evidence and apprehend the assailant. A strong report can also strengthen a case for prosecution.
·        Talk with a counsellor who is trained to assist rape victims. Counselling can help you learn how to cope with the emotional and physical impacts of the assault.

This is an excerpt from ‘Breaking the Silence’ - there are more useful tips and information on “how to protect your kids from sexual abuse at school, home or anywhere). It was written by Esther Ijewere-Kalejaiye with the forward written by Hon. Abike Dabiri-Erewa, member of the Federal House of Representatives and currently, Chairman of House Committee on Diaspora Affairs.
The book has been endorsed by the Lagos State Deputy Governor.

For more information on this book sale, or for information on how to support the C. A. R. E (College Acquaintance Rape Education) Project by donating copies of  this book to schools, please call any of these numbers: 0806 865 3263, 0805 786 1285, 08102 678 442.

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