"MARRIAGE HASN'T WEAKENED MY FIGHT AGAINST RAPE" - Esther Ijewere-Kalejaiye

For those who don’t know her, Esther Ijewere-Kalejaiye is a foremost Social Activist, Youth Advocate and Organizer of the annual 'Walk Against Rape campaign' and 'project Capable'.

Just years back, she was ever-present and very active as a social crusader against the then growing RAPE CULTURE in Nigeria while fearlessly lending her voice against cases of sexual assault amid offering 'free' counselling and rehabilitation services to the victims.

No sooner had she walked down the aisle and said, “I do” to her heartthrob than it seemed she disappeared from public view while her passion for the fight against rape fizzled out.

Notable among her much-missed projects, was the annual 'Walk Against Rape Nigeria (W.A.R)', a project fully endorsed by the Lagos State Government, which is a special campaign and demonstration for silent victims of rape and abuse where celebrities, entertainers, youth advocates, civil societies, women organisations, NGO’s, faith based organisations and others all come together to lend their voice to victims of rape and also demand for proper justice to perpetrators.

But much against what most people thought, Esther, a graduate of Sociology from Olabisi Onabanjo University, has come out to say that marriage didn't, and won't affect her career choices.

In this exclusive interview with Kingsley Okenwa (correspondent for Rubies Media Int'l), the Walk against Rape co-ordinator said she has been able to achieve a good balance between her personal and professional lives.

Contrary to what most people assumed that marriage had gotten a larger part of her life, she said: "I'll continue to be at the forefront as a Youth Advocate and a Social Crusader against the Rape culture in Nigeria. My ultimate aim is to be part of the fight against rape. I don't think my being married (or as a mother) is going to change anything on my career front. My profession is not going to get overwhelmed by my personal life."

She talked on a lot of sensitive issues and what she's been up to since she went on her ‘sabbatical’.

Here's the chit chat:

Rubies Ink Media: Thanks for talking to us! Can you start off by telling everyone who you are and what spurred you into the fight against Rape?

Mrs Esther: I’m Esther Ijewere-Kalejaiye, graduate of sociology from the Olabisi Onabanjo University, Wife and Mother to two beautiful girls, youth advocate and social activist. I’m the executive director of rubies ink initiative, project coordinator of walk against rape campaign Nigeria and Project Capable, all projects under the rubies ink umbrella. My strong passion for humanity and affinity for change spurred me to fight against rape, to become a voice for several voiceless people who are victims of rape.

Rubies Ink Media: You are always embittered whenever you talk about rape; would that mean you or someone so dear to you had been a victim or what?

Mrs Esther: Yes someone close to me was raped when I was in the university. It was a terrible experience.

Rubies Ink Media: On a scale of ten, how would you score the Government's effort in fighting the Rape culture in Nigeria?

Mrs Esther: I will say its average for now. We are not yet there but with the bill that was presented to the house and approved, I believe things will change.

Rubies Ink Media: If you had an audience with the Presidency to talk about how they can win the fight over rape, what would you tell them?

Mrs Esther: Don’t just approve the bill and enact laws, let’s see you put it into action; this will put offenders in check.

Rubies Ink Media: Would you say the fight against Rape in Nigeria is gradually being won or rather, has been on the increase?

Mrs Esther: It’s both ways - rape and sexual abuse is on the increase and yes people are beginning to report cases of rape and get justice as well. Like I said, the new law will put offenders in check.

Rubies Ink Media: What are the challenges facing the fight against rape and why is it that most victims don't come out to complain?

Mrs Esther: Stigmatisation! Victims are afraid of being stigmatised and that’s one major reason victims don’t come out or report; they are often blamed and criticised. This is one of the areas Govt needs to address, sensitising people on how to treat victims of rape with love and affection.

Rubies Ink Media: Why would a man rape a woman? Some have said it has to do with the way some ladies dress seductively; how true is this?

Mrs Esther: Indiscipline is the main reason. Indecent dressing is not a reason for a man to rape a woman. In fact, you can’t justify rape. Yes, we should sensitise our ladies on the need to dress appropriately but not using rape or sexual abuse as a yardstick for them to do so but rather as a necessity based on our culture and tradition as Africans.

Rubies Ink Media: How long are your tentacles of the fight against Rape? Do you have outreach in schools because studies show that there's where most rape cases occur?

Mrs Esther: We organise sensitising workshops in several secondary schools across the country and we also have an online platform for university students where we educate them on rape and sexual abuse

Rubies Ink Media: Let's talk about the Judiciary and the Police Force; how have they fared in their fight against this scourge? Have they been supportive to the course of Anti-rape activists in bringing perpetrators to book?

Mrs Esther: The Judiciary is making sure offenders are punished though the police treat rape cases with levity but in recent times, they are beginning to handle cases of sexual abuse with seriousness.

Rubies Ink Media: How do you feel now that you're married? Do you feel fulfilled as a woman, or ruffled as a career woman?

Mrs Esther: Yes, I feel fulfilled as a married woman and mother of two wonderful girls but I’m still trying to find a balance between my career and the home front. I enjoy being both.

Rubies Ink Media: You've been out of the scene and quiet on Rape cases since you got married; does that mean marriage has gotten a better part of you much against your profession?

Mrs Esther: Well, I haven’t been totally off the scene; we still organised the campaign last year just few months after I had my first child. I handle rape cases even from home and direct the victims to the Ministry of Women Affairs like we always do and then, follow up from there. My job is flexible, so, I handle both very well and I’m still very active on the field.

Rubies Ink Media: Is your husband a part of your organization? If not, how would he react to your decision of returning to public view in the fight against rape?

Mrs Esther: I’m married to a wonderful man; he understands the nature of my job and gives me the needed support as a friend and most importantly, as a companion. He is my biggest fan. He can’t wait for me to get back to work fully.

Rubies Ink Media: Since you 'settled down', what have you been doing?

Mrs Esther: I’m working on a couple of things. I can’t let the cat out of the bag fully for now but one of the most important things I have been working on, is a guidebook on rape. It’s almost ready to be presented to the public.

Rubies Ink Media: Guidebook? What's the book about?

Mrs Esther: It’s a handbook actually that talks about rape, its effect, the need to report cases of rape, where to report cases, the essence of speaking out and other vital information on rape and sexual abuse.

Rubies Ink  Media: How soon do we expect the book launch and in the stands?

Mrs Esther: Very soon…

Rubies Ink Media: Who are the book's target audience?

Mrs Esther: It’s a must-have for everyone; mothers, guardians, teachers, students and parents.

Rubies Ink Media: About the much-missed Walk Against Rape, what are your plans for it? Or is it in the cooler?

Mrs Esther: It’s on hold for now pending the time we launch the book, which is a follow up for the campaign.

Rubies Ink Media: On a final note; let's hear you say something about the fight against Rape?

Mrs Esther: Rape is a crime against humanity; no one deserves to be raped or abused! Say no to RAPE, speak out and break the silence!